Navigating changes in a relationship, particularly those related to physical appearance, can be a delicate and emotional journey. A Bright Side reader is having a hard time after his wife underwent plastic surgery. He shared a letter with us seeking our advice.
He shared his side of the story.
Here are some tips that we believe can help you.
- Reflect on Your Feelings: Take some time to reflect on your feelings and understand why the changes in your wife’s appearance are affecting you. Are your concerns purely aesthetic, or do they come from deeper emotional reasons? Understanding your own feelings will help you communicate more effectively with your wife.
- Communicate Honestly and Compassionately: Approach the topic with empathy and compassion. Let your wife know that you love her deeply and that your concerns come from a place of care. Use «I» statements to express your feelings without placing blame.
- Focus on Emotions, Not Criticism: Avoid criticizing your wife’s appearance directly. Instead, focus on expressing how the changes make you feel. For example, you might say, «I miss the unique features that made you who you are,» rather than, «You don’t look like yourself anymore.»
- Reassure Her of Your Love: Make sure your wife knows that your love for her goes beyond physical appearance. Reassure her that you’re committed to supporting her through any challenges she faces, including those related to self-image.
- Encourage Open Dialogue: Encourage open and honest communication between the two of you. Create a safe space where both of you feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.
- Seek Professional Help If Needed: If you find it difficult to navigate these conversations on your own, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor. A professional can provide guidance and support as you work through your feelings together.
- Focus on Shared Activities: Spend quality time together engaging in activities that you both enjoy. Focus on building emotional intimacy and strengthening your bond as a couple.
- Support Her Self-Esteem: Encourage your wife to focus on aspects of herself that she feels confident about, aside from her appearance. Remind her of her strengths and accomplishments.
- Be Patient and Understanding: Remember that adjusting to changes in appearance can be a complex process, and it may take time for both of you to adapt. Be patient with each other and offer support along the way.
- Explore Ways to Reconnect: Find ways to reconnect as a couple and reignite the spark in your relationship. Whether it’s through shared hobbies, romantic gestures, or simply spending quality time together, prioritize nurturing your connection.
By approaching the situation with empathy, understanding, and open communication, you can navigate this challenging time with grace and compassion.
Remembering the Stars Who Have Died Since Appearing on ‘Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew’
Since the VH1 reality show’s 2008 debut, twelve of its alumni have passed away.
Celebrity Rehab was founded by Dr. Drew Pinsky to counter the tabloids’ depiction of addiction, according to a 2009 New York Times article on the set of the show. Pinsky, 65, was first opposed to the concept of receiving treatment on television. Following the premiere of the first season of the show, the addiction medicine expert told PEOPLE about his friend, counselor Bob Forrest, who persuaded him to get treatment: “He said, ‘I am so tired of people talking about rehab who have no idea what they’re talking about.’” They are unaware of the struggles and addictions that celebrities face.
The VH1 series, which ran from 2008 to 2011, featured a number of celebrities addressing their substance misuse problems in the Pasadena Recovery Center in California with Pinsky. Celebrity Rehab featured prominent artists, actresses, sports, TV celebrities, models, and more throughout the course of five seasons. Regretfully, following their performances on the reality show, twelve celebrities have passed away. Let’s examine their lives in more detail and how they openly discussed their difficulties in an effort to assist others.
If substance misuse is a problem for you or someone you know, please call the SAMHSA helpline at 1-800-662-HELP. Please call the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988, text “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Text Line at 741741, or visit 988lifeline.org if you or someone you know is thinking about taking their own life.
It’s funny how life tricks us, isn’t it? The frontman of Crazy Town, who was well-known for being insane both on stage and, regrettably, off, died in June 2024 at the age of 49. Shifty went in and out of dangerous circumstances during his career, including comas and DUI accusations. It was heartbreakingly obvious how much cocaine and medications affected him. “If I kept at it, I was going to die,” he once said to PEOPLE. My goal is to remain sober.
Tom Sizemore
On March 3, 2023, Tom Sizemore, the guy whose Golden Globe-nominated performances could have you riveted to the screen, passed away. His struggle with drug usage was more tragic than amusing. Paul, his brother, said, “He was bigger than life.” More than anyone I know, he has impacted my life. I am heartbroken by his passing and will always mourn him.
Frankie Lons
Every child’s worst dread is to watch their own mother battle addiction before giving in to it. Frankie Lons, the mother of Keyshia Cole, had a turbulent life. What a horrible irony it was that she died on her own birthday. The emotional Instagram post from Elite Noel, her daughter, stated it all: “My mother in a body bag on her birthday is the worst anguish I have ever experienced! My heart ached so much.
Kitaen Tawny
At the age of 59, actress and ’80s star Tawny Kitaen passed away quietly at her Newport Beach home. Her children Wynter and Raine verified their grief with a statement, “You gave her life every day,” following her diagnosis of dilated cardiomyopathy. We love and miss her, and we are aware that her legacy will endure forever.
McKibbin, Nikki
Do you recall Nikki McKibbin from the inaugural season of American Idol? She was generous enough to give her organs before she went away at the age of 42 from a brain aneurysm. Craig, her spouse, put it poetically: “Even in the end, she is still giving.” An appropriate homage to a giving person.
Jason Davis
At the age of 35, the voice actor that embodied a character in Disney’s Recess passed away from fentanyl overdose. His mother remembered him as a season 4 participant who “had a true heart of gold with such a zest for life.”
Chyna
On April 17, 2016, Chyna, a formidable WWE performer, passed away. The mixture of drugs in her system was the accidental offender. Her life served as an example of publicly facing one’s inner problems while clinging to hope.
Mindy McCready
On February 17, 2013, Mindy McCready, a country music vocalist with a beautiful voice, suddenly passed away. She dealt with alcohol and opioid addictions on the show, and her end was clouded in sadness following the suicide of her boyfriend. A terrible domino effect.
Joey Kovar
Joey Kovar, a reality star from The Real World: Hollywood, passed away suddenly at the age of 29. A life that appeared to be headed toward happiness was ended by opioid abuse. With regret, his brother remarked, “He had turned into such a happy person.” I’m still not really clear what transpired.
Rodney King
On June 17, 2012, the civil rights activist passed away at the age of 47. King’s stress from the vicious assault he suffered in 1991 at the hands of LAPD cops drove him to battle substance usage. Alcohol, marijuana, PCP, and cocaine all had a nasty part in his death; he was discovered drowning in his swimming pool.
Jeff Conaway
The well-known face of Grease actor Jeff Conaway concealed personal troubles. On May 27, 2011, the man who lighted up Broadway and little theaters alike passed away. He battled his addictions all the way to the end, but his job and the people in his life gave him comfort.
Mike Starr
To wrap up this solemn homage, on March 8, 2011, Alice in Chains’ Mike Starr overdosed on prescription drugs. Friends, family, and fans came together for an open memorial service in Seattle to honor a life that inspires people via music.
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